"You Are the Camera"

I didn't actually write any more last night, after I posted the last entry. I got sucked in by a technological wonder...

My mom's boyfriend bought her a webcam, and then decided to get me one so that me and mom could do video-phone-calls. So, in the course of my mom receiving a present, I received a present as well.

I hooked the camera up with surprisingly little difficulty last night. It makes movies and takes snapshots, so it's sorta like having a very heavy and non-portable digital camera. Here's a picture, courtesy of the new webcam:

That's me looking pensive. And also about three-days unshaven, which is that little white trash touch that means so much...

Now I've got a webcam... and besides video-talking to mom on it, what can I do with the thing? Scott and I discussed possibilities for streaming video subjects:

• A terrarium full of scorpions and hamsters

• Brenda's cats shredding a plant

• Our shower drain. Big excitement is when someone cleans out the hair

• Our sidewalk. Big excitement is when drunks wander by singing at 3 a.m.

• An Elmer Fudd "Chia Head"

• Tambourine Guy playing "All Along the Watchtower" in his usual atonal fashion

• Have-A-Nice-Day Guy sitting on his bench under his plastic bag, unmoving

• Scott's Lava Lamp (streaming video of a lava lamp would probably gain an audience, actually)

That's all we've come up with so far. None of those ideas particularly move me. Feel free to send in your own suggestions... I guess me and Scott could make art films. Dawson could do some performance art, except that would almost certainly make a mess of my bedroom... if only I still lived near Josh Barber! That madman would have a thousand twisted ideas for this webcam before breakfast...

I got my eyes checked today. The doctor told me my pupils are "unusually large," but functional. I'm not sure what to think about that.

I tried not to fall in love with the doctor's gorgeous assistant. Brunette, with a stud in her nose, beautiful face... She has this great classic-style bike with a huge basket. She's cool. I'm a dork with big pupils. Alas.

I've never, ever had an optometrist tell me that I have beautiful eyes. All they notice is the myopia and the blood vessels encroaching on the corneas and the melted slag I have in place of cones...

I'm gonna wander around for a bit and then do some work, I suppose... I don't know if I'm going to get 50K written by Tuesday night. Will you all be terribly disappointed in me if I fail to do so? The day job's been sorta stressful this week; I think I need a bit of chill-time in the evenings. I'm pretty pleased with my output, all things considered. If I can keep doing 2 or 3K a night, that's nothing to be ashamed of, right?

You're ashamed. I know you are. I feel sort of silly for setting this goal for myself. It seemed like a good motivator, but I'm pretty motivated to work on this book anyway. I enjoy it. The only result my "50K in 9 days" goal has had so far is to make me feel bad for not writing more, and that blows.

It wouldn't kill me to complete the year 2000 without finishing a novel. Especially if I finish it in January, which is likely.

And if I still feel guilty, I can write two or three novels next year to make up for it, right? :)